Yesterday I skimmed back over previous posts and wrote down the aliases of all the people whose names have been changed. I totally stole that concept from Tucker Max. If you like dirty stories from a guy who seems to have no conscience or dignity, you really should check out his website However, if you are easily offended or have an overactive upchuck reflex, you might wanna skip it. To be perfectly honest, DH introduced me to his stories and when I read the one he picked out for me, I was disgusted and thought that Tucker Max had to be the biggest egomaniac douchebag asshat in the world. But DH had bookmarked it on my laptop and I was out of town working, bored in the hotel room so I started reading a few more of the stories, and I was hooked. I contemplated buying the book, but B&N didn't have it on sale, so I rented the movie I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell instead. Needless to say, DH was shocked when I brought that one home from the Redbox. And the guy who plays Tucker in the movie, Matt Czuchry, is exactly the kind of guy I pictured Tucker to be. The name Matt Czuchry may not sound familiar to you unless you watched Gilmore Girls. He played Logan, Rory's final love interest. I was so sad when that show went off the air. Yeah, I know, Rory graduated from college and Lorelai and Luke got together and geez, what were they gonna do, bring in a cute kid ala The Cosby Show or Full House (although Gilmore Girls didn't really have a cute kid, unless you count Rory, but she was a teenager when the show started). OK now I'm totally off the subject. Oh, yeah, I stole Tucker Max's habit of making aliases for the people he mentions in his stories.
The whole reason I started this entry was that I realized I hadn't really said anything about the results of the pathology after my surgery and what the plan is. I'd only bitched a lot about being in the hospital and being in pain. Don't worry. I'll get back to those subjects because you've got to hear about Nurse Ratched.
OK so remember the biopsy results...invasive ductal carcinoma, grade 2, with an extensive in situ component. There were a total of at least 5 microscopic foci. The suspicious area on the mammogram was about 50mm x 50mm x 45mm (62 mm in a radial fashion...whatever that means). The surgical pathology showed an infiltrating ductal carcinoma with three foci, intermediate grade, largest was 1.1 cm and two smaller were 0.5 cm each, positive for angiolymphatic invasion and ductal carcinoma in situ, intermediate grade with necrosis and cancerization of lobules. Essentially what all that means is that what they found in the surgery is what they were expecting to find based on the biopsy. No better, no worse. Mastectomy was the appropriate treatment and if we'd planned lumpectomy plus radiation Dr. M (surgeon) likely would have needed to go ahead and do a mastectomy anyway.
I opted for the bilateral because I know if I have cancer in one breast, I am more likely to get it in the other breast. Now I realize breast cancer can come back even without breasts, but honestly, the amount of surveillance they want to do on your other breast after you've had breast cancer once is astounding. Two MRIs and two mammograms a year, alternating and spaced three months apart, is A. expensive, B. stressful waiting for results, and C. I don't think I could handle another MRI again, much less twice a year. Just thinking about my MRI makes me wanna throw up. I would rather have a biopsy and I'd seriously consider having a root canal rather than another MRI. Besides, I'm 36...I want a matched pair!
Lymph nodes were negative, so based on the size of the tumors it's a Stage 1 cancer. It's ER+, PR- and Her2-. The plan is chemotherapy with a cytophosphane (nitrogen mustard alkylating agent) and a taxane, given together every three weeks for four to six doses, plus an estrogen blocking agent for five years. I went ahead and enrolled in a clinical trial comparing the estrogen blocking agents tamoxifen and an aromatase inhibitor for recurrence in premenopausal women. The current standard of treatment is tamoxifen for five years. Because I may be randomized into the group that gets the aromatase inhibitor, I will be given a GnRH angonist which will put me into a chemical menopause. Dr. M (the oncologist) said I didn't need adriamycin since the tumors were small, I am young, and the drug is very hard on your heart.
Both chemo agents will cause me to lose my hair, so hopefully Pinup Barber can turn my hairdo into Twiggy's this week so I can start getting used to it. Well, maybe a hot pink Twiggy! And menopause...well, let's just hope I can get through it without killing too many people!
DH and my mom are both concerned about my enrolling in a clinical trial, but someone has to do it. It's not like they won't be treating me, I'll either get treated with the current standard or with something they've already studied a lot and think might be better. I hope someday they will find a cure for cancer, but if patients don't take part in clinical trials, researchers and physicians won't know about better treatments. Cancer treatment regimens are constantly changing and that is thanks to clinical trials and research.
Well, since I didn't get crap done yesterday, I'm gonna get dressed, run Baby Boy to preschool and try to accomplish something tangible today. Then again, I may just read a book.
Woo-hoo. the no lymph involvement is awesome!!!!! Even though I had a mastectomy w/ no lymph involvement, I have no personal exp. with Chemo,(my cancerous tumors were both less than 10 mil.) but you are tough and you will get through it with nothing but a dim memory. Hugs!!
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